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Situations I Can Help With

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There always seems to be an ever growing list in life of things which can become problematic.

Confusing and difficult emotions, relationship and family stresses, work difficulties, long term illnesses and pain, bereavement, difficult upbringing and life experiences are just a few of the things people come to see me about. 

The list of what I can help you with is very varied. The aim of my approach and this type of therapy is to help you learn Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) skills so you can become your own therapist. For most people CBT is a short to medium term therapy but if life becomes difficult in the future it enables you to treat yourself with your own set of tools.

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The most common reasons people consult me are:

  • Anxiety (including generalised anxiety disorders, social anxiety, health anxiety, panic attacks, situational anxiety, phobias, OCD, post traumatic stress disorder, work or relationship stress).

  • Depression

  • Insomnia

  • Long term pain or illness

  • Sexual problems

  • Fear of public speaking

  • Performance anxiety

  • Lack of self esteem

  • Habits like binge drinking

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However often issues are complex and may involve several aspects of the issues listed. Sometimes people just feel stuck and that their life is not where they want it to be. Talking through things in a focused way can help to get clarity on what needs to change. My role is to help facilitate change through questioning, understanding and encouragement within the cognitive therapy framework.

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ENVY
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We can all see something that we want and can't have but it becomes unhealthy when it becomes an obsession or when we would rather destroy the object of our desire than let someone else have it.

 

 CBT shows us how to access and then accept that this is unhealthy and change to a more healthy desire.

ANXIETY  
 

Anxiety can have both physical symptoms and unhealthy automatic thoughts. Where there is an anxiety reaction it is likely there is a perceived danger or threat (often referred to as flight or fight). There may also be a need for control or certainty.

Often people feel completely unable to cope. They might have very frightening catastrophic thoughts that play out in their mind. This can escalate the stress response which in turn escalates the uncomfortable physical sensations. This can lead to tranquilising feelings by increasing alcohol consumption, drug taking or over eating as a way to escape.

With CBT clients can learn to manage their distress.

People with anxiety may also have depression. 

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ANGER
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Anger can affect your general life, work and or relationships. It is generally because rigid, inflexible expectations that you hold have been broken or there is a threat to your self esteem. It can lead to unhealthy coping behaviours such as drug taking and increased alcohol intake.

 

 CBT can help you feel calmer and more in control. You can learn effective strategies to let go of beliefs which maintain your anger.

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People who are angry often struggle with hurt and shame.

DEPRESSION
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1 in 4 people in their lifetime will suffer from depression. It can arise as a result of a loss or a perceived failure and is characterised by low mood, appetite and a lack of care over self and environment. People with depression often feel an intense and unhealthy sense of hopelessness and helplessness and withdraw from people, social activities and work. This can lead to attempts to terminate feeling in self destructive ways.

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CBT can help people regain a sense of purpose in life.

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People with depression may also struggle with toxic emotions such as Hurt or Shame.

GUILT

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Guilt can, but not exclusively, be part of grief. It may be a perceived or real failure to live up to ones own moral code. It may be guilt over hurting the feelings of a significant other. Often the guilty reaction is a strong feeling of doing wrong and being sinful. This can lead to attempting to escape from the pain of unhealthy guilt by seeking punishment. Sometimes this may be physical or by deprivation.

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CBT can help people to understand that they can live with remorse and accept that we are all fallible human beings.

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HURT
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Hurt may stem from others unjustly treating you badly. You may feel upset or uncared for and that everything is unfair. You may also ruminate over past hurts. This may lead to shutting down communication with others.

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CBT can help you to learn how to communicate feelings directly to others

 

People who are hurt often struggle with anger.

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JEALOUSY
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Jealousy is a very specific emotion and is often linked to something in our past. We have all had a time in a relationship where we have felt rightly or wrongly concerned. But jealousy can be all consuming. It's unhealthiness to self and others can lead to relationships breaking up - the one thing we are trying to avoid.

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CBT can help you to look at the logic and truth of your unhealthy beliefs and to move forward.

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SHAME
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In this the social media age shame is becoming more and more an issue. Other people can find out or we can disclose information about ourselves that we wish was not known publicly. This can lead to an unhealthy belief of feeling completely wrong as a person. When this happens we can respond by isolating our self from others or we may attack those who shamed us.

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CBT can help to restore a sense of self worth.

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